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Reddit Gives Us The Only List Of “Helpful” EDM Tips You’ll Ever Need

Reddit is a great place for sharing ideas, original content, and even new music. Anyone looking for a place to learn the ins-and-outs of our scene can usually browse through the EDM subreddit and get a pretty good grasp on what’s good, what’s bad, and everything in between. That being so, one stalwart rave veteran took it upon himself to provide us with a comprehensive (and ridiculously hilarious) list of helpful tips for newcomers to dance music.

Check it out below, consider yourself educated, and never forget: Everyone is a sellout and Martin Garrix’ music is implicitly evil.

[textblock style=”3″]Via dropEleven:

  • raves used to be better
  • like, you don’t even know
  • big room house is terrible
  • no, that’s progressive house
  • no, that’s progressive trance
  • no, that’s electro-house-dark-psy-trance-moobahtron-trap with raggacore cybergrind elements, you fucking idiot
  • your misappropriating that impossibly specific sub genre is physically offensive to me on a cellular level
  • tiesto is a sellout
  • david guetta is a sellout
  • hardwell is a sellout
  • eric prydz is a sell out
  • pryda is a sell out
  • you didn’t know they were the same person? (scoffs) okay…
  • afrojack is a sell out
  • hardwell is a sellout
  • nicky romero is a sellout
  • avicci is a sellout
  • martin garrix is literally hitler
  • armin van buuren is okay
  • no, on second thought, fuck that. armin is a sellout
  • you’re probably a sell out too
  • everyone is a sellout
  • except deadmau5, who is king of king and i can laugh at all of it because i get all of his inside jokes
  • it’s okay for us to dress like this, but look at you, you skanky slut
  • it’s better to go to a festival and bitch the whole time about how everyone has ruined it rather than try to find your own space to enjoy yourself
  • trance is dead
  • PLUR is dead
  • god is dead too
  • i wish martin garrix was dead
  • selfies are literally the worst thing you can do
  • in fact, everyone taking pictures is awful. why can’t you just enjoy the music the way i enjoy the music?
  • EXCEPTION TO THE RULE: it’s not only okay, but somehow encouraged for 90% of the girls to take 17 of the exact same posed and filtered picture and post it to instagram with a needlessly detailed caption and 23 hashtags begging for people to follow her account
  • seriously, all of you taking pictures and being happy makes me so goddamned mad.
  • i don’t need drugs to enjoy the music, so i’m better than you
  • even though i’m probably on drugs too
  • like enough to put a rhino in a coma
  • if you haven’t been doing this for longer than i have, you just don’t get it and you’re everything that’s wrong with the scene
  • glovers are literally hitler
  • can you imagine if fucking martin garrix gloved?
  • god damn it

[/textblock]

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Pop culture junkie, dinosaur enthusiast, and proud Managing Editor. While an avowed basshead, has been known to be ever-so-slightly trance-curious under the right circumstances.

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